Wednesday, May 30, 2007

All about blokes ...

... met this one last week (you know who you are ... hmmm). Shapely head, prominent A's apple and not much else. Really. Truth be told, he leaned more towards the asinine than anything I have come across in awhile - and I meet a few.

Said bloke speaks thusly:

"This place is something else (accompanied by eyes rolling into above mentioned shiny pate). Back in England", says he, "all I would need to do is find a vendor, give him the required specs and chop chop - know what I mean?"

Yes, I did know.

"So", continues bloke "I need someone from your office to come with me to the SITE and suggest or come forward with a good solution for a long term, you know, durable, and you know, VISIBLE kind of sign for blah blah and more of the same ...

That would be me, says I.

"You"? he says. "A huh" says he.

M hmm, says I.

"Na-ah", he continues in his baa lamb kind of way "you see, my dear" (sound of grinding teeth - mine.), "what we need heaarre is a production man" says this sorry bloke. "We need to go to the SITE you understand"?

I'm thinking - What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What?

When I was able to swallow again, thus flowed my responses:

"Bloke" I said (no, not really I didn't). "Come along and show me the damned site already". "Chop chop now". "Haven't got all day". "And no man, from production or otherwise is coming along". "So, its me you've got". And to the sound of drumrolls I round off with this masterpiece "In other words, ALL you've got is ME" .

"Well spoken" says the bloke. Who was now also a wiseass.

Round one to the bloke.


Tys on Ice said...

Sometimes one sees a lonely bloke
Standing on his only block
his neck stretched out
hands out a knife
for some passerby to slit his throat.

Way to go girl..

Mathura D said...

Is this also going to be a daily soap. There was ice laced tys whip, now this!
Oh my bleedin soul..

Smitha said...

I say, Cloak the bloke!

Thats Me! Says V from Jap Talk :-)